Frustrations

Be warned, this is not going to be a very positive post.

I am very frustrated with school and the constant changes.  I am a person who thrives on organization and structure and this country and school system are totally lacking both.  I believe that is what is frustrating me the most, and making it the most difficult to be here.  Culture shock.

Last week ADEC decided that they needed to extend our school day from 1:55 to 2:15.  They imposed this change on a Tues (I think).  So, we had to deal with this.  I think the principal just lengthened the break.  Which is a good thing because all the girls had for break, which included eating, playing, and going to the bathroom, was 20 minutes.  Now they have 35 minutes.  Which is still too short, but better.  So anyway on Wed. of this week the school day was changed back to 2:00.  So the schedule is totally changed.  The morning classes are shorter and the afternoon classes are longer.  Does that make any sense???  Not to me.  Knowing that the afternoon is more difficult than the morning, why would I make it longer?  Knowing that children learn better in the morning, why would I make the morning shorter?  I am not in charge so I just have to deal with these ridiculous, or should I say stupid, changes.

I was also informed on Wed. that I would no longer have my own classroom.  I would have to go back and forth between 2 Arabic teachers classrooms.  We, the LTs, tried to convince the principal that this was not a good decision, but we were unsuccessful.  She said that ADEC informed her that the LTs needed to be in an Arabic teacher's room.  I don't believe that they meant that we needed to have 2 classrooms.  I think they meant that we needed to be co-teachers with an Arabic teacher.  I am all for that.  We tried to explain that to her, but she had her mind set on us moving instead of the girls.  So, I am now back in the yellow room that I was in at the beginning of the year.  I also have another room, which isn't as cheerful.  I have a little cabinet in the yellow room to store my stuff.  I do not have a desk that is really mine as the Arabic teacher uses it as well.  I do not know where to put my stuff that I need on a daily basis.  I do not know where to put the books that the girls read after they finish an assingment.  Books are so important and they need to be in the classroom (both classrooms so that means that I will have to take them with me).  Math manipulatives, where do I put those so they can be easily used by both classes?  Art supplies?  Paper?  I am going to have to get a suitcase that I can take back and forth.  I know that teachers have dealt with this and have survived, so I know it can be done.  But I also know that I need organization and it is going to be so hard to be organized in this situation.  I know in some ways this will be better.  There will be no more going up and down stairs.  No more waiting for the girls to get their books and get in line.  No more listening to them telling me that they left something downstairs.  So I will just have to try to focus on that and learn to be organized in this chaotic environment.

I miss teaching the way I am used to teaching.  I miss involving the students in their learning.  I miss planning projects.  I miss group work.  I am tired of teaching whole group lessons all the time.  I am tired of teaching rote learning.  I know I am better than this.  But I am having a hard time teaching in this environment.  The girls aren't ready for group work.  I do not have the resources either.  I am told to bring Western styles of teaching here by ADEC, but the principal wants me to teach out of the book.  What a conflict.  She will even check the books to make sure that we are using them.  ADEC wants me to teach in a child centered manner; they want me to teach creative thinking, problem solving, and critical thinking.  The principal wants worksheets and book learning.  One of the reasons I left teaching in NC was that with all the emhasis on testing and test results I wasn't convinced that I was a good teacher.  I now KNOW that I am a good teacher and I am a better at teaching than I am doing right now.  I KNOW that I am better than this.  I will just do the best I can and hope that one day I will be able to teach how I am used to teaching.  I hope that one day I will be able to teach problem solving, creative thinking, cooperative group work, and critical thinking skills.  That's what ADEC wants, but the principal really isn't there yet. 

So, I will close by saying that I hope and pray that I will make it 2 years here.  2 years isn't a long time, but it's a long time when you are completely frustrated with your job.  Maybe next year (or sooner) ADEC and the principal will realize the need and importance of having both an LT and an Arabic teacher in all classrooms at all times.  That would be fantastic!

My curtains are hung and most of my furniture has arrived, now it's just adding the final touches that will help make this feel like home for the next 2 (hopefully) years.  Still no car.  I was supposed to go on Thurs, but the furniture that was scheduled to come from 10-5 didn't show up until 8:30.  By the time the furniture was put together the rental car shop was closed.  They were also closed today (Friday), so hopefully tomorrow will be the day.

Good night all!